They couldn't believe I did this!

If I had a dollar for every time someone watched me eat something and went, "Wow you actually eat that still?" I'd be a millionaire, I SWEAR.

People assume that because I'm a certified nutrition coach that I must eat the most boring, lifeless food. LET ME BUST THAT MYTH RIGHT UP for ya.

Here's the truth. Do I do my best to eat foods that are preservative, artificial flavor and color-free, and avoid processed items? YES. Do I give up the foods I love like tacos, MUFFINS, pancakes, ice cream, chocolate, or wine simply because I consider myself a healthy person? NO.

The misconception here is that in order to lead a healthy lifestyle you must give up everything that tastes good and do a bunch of cardio 5-6x a week to be "skinny."

There are so many things wrong with that picture, and I'll tell you why. But first answer this question for me: When you tell yourself you have to give something up, what is your brain's almost immediate response? "I want it even more, and I need it NOW."

So many people drop out of the running for their health and fitness goals because they go into it with the wrong mindset. They think of it like a punishment or a prison sentence for their body when it wasn't their body that got them to the place they're in; it was their minds.

Your mind made the choice to go through the fast food drive-through 4x last week. Your mind made the decision to have an entire bottle of Prosecco at Kristin's bachelorette party last weekend. Your mind chose to eat that entire sleeve of Oreos hiding on the floor of your pantry after the kids went to bed. Your body simply acted upon that decision your mind chose.

We need to stop punishing our bodies and playing the guilt trip and shame spiral on ourselves. You're not a bad person because you made these choices. Your brain just needs a different filter from which to view these choices from so you can begin swapping out old habits with new ones. I'm going to share a few mindset shifts that have helped me and my clients make better choices in line with our goals.

1) Stop labeling foods as "good" or "bad"- especially around your children. This goes back to to shaming and temptations. If you tell yourself you can't have something, you want it more no matter your age. And if you tell yourself you can't have that thing because it's "bad" and you make the choice to have it anyways, you are initiating in your brain the thought that you deserve to be punished for making a bad choice. Cue guilt, shame, and what usually ends up leading to self sabotage and a "f*6k it" attitude.

It usually goes something like this: "I've already eaten some cookies today, so what's a milkshake and some brownies and French fries to go with it? I ruined my whole diet for the day so there's no reason to hold back now. I'll start over again tomorrow."

Anndddd then tomorrow turns into next week, next month, or next year. Or after I stop having babies. Or after I finish this deadline at work. Or after the honeymoon.

2) Which leads me to number 2. We think that we need to start something at the beginning of a new day, month, week, year, etc. While yes, it can be easier to mark your calendar for a fresh start and it visually appears better to those of us with slight OCD tendencies (haha), in reality it's covering up another excuse. If there's something you want to start doing because deep down you know it's something you will benefit from long term, then you need to realize that the time is going to pass whether you start now or not. However, won't you feel better in 30 days having started NOW, rather than being even further from your goal a month from now? Don't you think you'll find yourself looking in the mirror upset because you didn't start sooner?

One of my favorite sayings is,

"When is the best time to plant a tree?

30 years ago.

When's the next best time to plant a tree?

Now!"

3) Stop worrying and obsessing over what you look like to other people because you're a beginner. YOU CANNOT MASTER SOMETHING WITHOUT FIRST BEING A BEGINNER. This doesn't just go for health and fitness. This is for EVERYTHING in life. I know this may sound obnoxious with all the capitalized text here, but I really need this to sink in. Fear holds so many of us back not because we are afraid to try but because we're afraid of how others will perceive us in our pursuit of the trying. You will probably look silly. You have to get over that. When babies first are learning to walk we don't watch them fall a few dozen times bumping into stuff, and go "well kid it just doesn't seem like you're cut out to be a walker. You should probably just give up while you're ahead." HECK NO. We praise and celebrate them for every little step they get to being closer to walking. This is how we need to treat ourselves in pursuit of a new goal and surround yourself with others who will support you and cheer you on.

4) Find a support system. There are some of us that are very self motivated and disciplined. Regardless, there will be some really hard days and even though you are more than capable of going it alone, you shouldn't have to. If your spouse, partner, parents, siblings, or friends are not being supportive of you right now, don't force it. They might not see the value in what you're doing YET. Or it very well could make them uncomfortable because they don't want to see you change and leave them behind. Either way, that's a THEM problem. Not a YOU problem. Seek to connect with other like-minded individuals that WILL be there for you. This could be running club, an accountability group, a mastermind community, a mommy group, a group fitness class. Just find people in your community, ask for that support *and* be willing to give it back.

5) Understand that everything comes one step at a time. Another reason so many people "fall off the wagon" after only a few short weeks is because they try to incorporate too many new skills at once. The first step could literally be as simple as eating your lunch everyday for a week, distraction-free from electronics. Just you and your food and maybe a beautiful park bench outside your office. These are some skills I work on with my new clients. Once you master one skill THEN you move onto the next. Not everything all at once. That's a recipe for burnout and overwhelm.

6) Everything in moderation. Back to the conversation I mentioned above where I am regularly getting asked how it is that I still eat the muffins, the chocolate, and the wine and still maintain my results- is because I now know when to walk away. I struggled with emotional binge eating for years so please don't think I just came into this world as one of the lucky ones free from circumstance. I worked really hard to get to where I am today and continue to work at it. I found in the beginning the more I told myself "no" the harder it was for me to follow through because it became it became all I could think about. So instead, I adopted a mindset of everything in moderation and that has allowed me to actually enjoy my journey in health and nutrition AND keep my results sustainably.

7) Always have an open mind. I was so against the gluten-free, coconut flour, cauliflower mumbo jumbo in the beginning. While yes there are still certain foods like my mom's homemade lasagna that just cannot be replaced by any "healthy" version- I was willing to experiment with different ingredients and recipes to make cleaner swaps for different foods. Did everything get a 10/10? No. There is a time and place for the full-fat items and indulgence. However, I am eating to fuel my body and if I can make a version of something I love at home with cleaner ingredients, then I'm going to do that. Health is a life long goal. I want to know exactly what's going in my body and where it comes from and the only way I've found to do that with 100% certainty is to get creative and experiment in my own kitchen.

I hope these mindset-shifting tips have helped put some things into perspective for you a little (or a lot!) Remember, nothing happens overnight. We cannot keep buying into these quick fixes and assuming that there will be no long-term consequences. We cannot be afraid to roll up our sleeves and do the work. Don't cheat yourself out of results because you keep trying to cut corners. You can lead a happy life and a healthy one, and most importantly you deserve to!

For more recipes, tips, tricks, and health hacks that you'll actually use, head over to my instagram page and give me a follow- @dashofpepper.fit